So something's up with Fuss the last few weeks.
I'd like to be able to blame it on an outside agitator- he's sick, he's this, he's whatever- but I think he's just growing really fast, it's messed up the schedule we've established over the last couple of months and that's increased his irascible unpredictability to levels not seen since he was a squalling grub of infancy, clenched and howling in the front pack while our hair turned grey.
We bought him a couple of pairs of 'next size up' shoes a few weeks back, thinking to be prepared. They were like clown shoes, nearly twice as long as they needed to be.
Now they fit perfectly, with just a bit of room in the toe.
I was always tall but not freakishly so until a tremendous burst of growth in 7th grade. It partially detached a bunch of slowpoke tendons and things, effectively crippling me for several months. Months spent happily in the 'special' PE class, playing ping pong and knocking golf balls around with my physically challenged fellows.
Being a teenager already caught up by the hormonal tempest it's impossible to know whether this made me ornerier than usual, but it seems likely.
I achieved this notable stature in spite of mom partying down and smoking two packs a day during her pregnancy, feeding me formula as a baby and smoking like a chimney until the day I moved out.
Fuss, in contrast, gestated in a constant stream of prenatal vitamins, baby yoga, regular visits from his doula, and upon his (rather traumatic) exit was gorged on breast milk in a pointedly smoke free home.
So, maybe its hitting him earlier?
Anyway, last night.
After nearly driving me mad Thursday (a day when I was not at my best, he was definitely at his worst and where there was no regaining control once I lost my grip on the wheel) he kept the pedal to the metal Friday. Fortunately for all concerned we were able to tag-team him- I really don't know how single parents do it. Wrangling Fuss has given me a greater appreciation for what mom went through. Wait till you have kids of your own! is one of those trite, hackneyed sayings that ends up being a shot glass brimming with hundred proof reality.
After an abortive morning outing where each of my proffered activities was greeted in turn by wailing, gnashing of teeth and strident demands to return home to see mama, I threw in the towel before his withering attack KO'ed my patience. Of course, returning home was no panacea. Nearly the moment he achieved Mama he began serenading her with the sweet refrain WANT DADA!
At some point shortly thereafter he passed out, uncharacteristically early and hard.
And slept for four hours.
Usually we'll try and get him up after an hour or so, but given the circumstances we let him go. Even knowing we'd pay for it at bed time, the trade off seemed worth it.
The rest of the day went well, running errands in town and taking a detour through the creek to throw rocks in the water and toss leaves into the rapids. Then, home.
He stayed up late, as expected. And he didn't want to go to bed, as always.
So we did our usual thing, and it went alright, until the point where the Wife thought he'd finally passed out and got up.
And he started howling, and he kept howling.
At some point I was gripping his ankles like prison shackles to stop him propelling himself off the bed while he thrashed around like a hooked Marlin.
This went on for longer than you'd think.
Eventually, after a long fight, he tired.
"Are you ready to go to sleep now?" I asked.
"Yeeeeeeeuh." he replied, in that flat, drawn-out way of his.
So I let go and wrapped him up in his buenies, and he snuffled and hiccuped like he does (this is how you can tell a genuine freakout from a freakout for display purposes- after a real one, he makes a very distinctive set of noises that trace back to early infanthood).
He'd settle down for a while, and you'd think he was ready to go, but then he'd start wailing and bellowing WANT MAMA, WANT MAMA! again, so I'd pat him and go "shhhhh, shhhhhh, it's okay, shhhhhhh" and he'd settle down for a while, then it would repeat.
Finally, after I know not how long, he fell asleep.
Nearly in tandem with Dada, in fact.
Hopefully tonight goes better.
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