Live, baby!
I picked up Nothing To Fear the day it came out, took it home and listened to it then called up Pelf and played Grey Matter to him over the phone.
Ah, prehistory!
Posts
Broken, Broken, Broken
1 hour ago
7.15.2009
7.13.2009
True Customer Tales
Guy at counter, to his friend:
"I was thinking about getting into English history...but....there's just sooo much of it."
"I was thinking about getting into English history...but....there's just sooo much of it."
7.12.2009
True Customer Tales
Austrailian family buying a book.
Me: Need a bag?
Guy, pointing thumb over shoulder: Naw, I got me wife!
While thumbing through his wallet for payment:
Gawd, all the damn money looks the same!
Wife, while digging for coins:
I have a lot of them, I just don't know what they are!
Me: Need a bag?
Guy, pointing thumb over shoulder: Naw, I got me wife!
While thumbing through his wallet for payment:
Gawd, all the damn money looks the same!
Wife, while digging for coins:
I have a lot of them, I just don't know what they are!
True Customer Tales
Dad, young brother and sister enter store.
Dad:
Do you know what time it is?
Me, looking at clock:
Quarter to three.
Dad:
Thanks.
Boy, yelling:
WHY IS IT SO QUIET IN HERE!
Girl, sarcastic:
Cuz it's a bookstore, dumbshit!
Boy:
Dad, she said a dirty word!
Dad, distractedly leafing through display book:
Yeah, I know.
Girl:
DAD LET'S GO, I don't want to be caught dead in a bookstore!
Dad:
Do you know what time it is?
Me, looking at clock:
Quarter to three.
Dad:
Thanks.
Boy, yelling:
WHY IS IT SO QUIET IN HERE!
Girl, sarcastic:
Cuz it's a bookstore, dumbshit!
Boy:
Dad, she said a dirty word!
Dad, distractedly leafing through display book:
Yeah, I know.
Girl:
DAD LET'S GO, I don't want to be caught dead in a bookstore!
7.10.2009
addenda
In the previous post, "HEY LADY" should be read in the style of the young Jerry Lewis.
Apologies for the late stage directions.
Apologies for the late stage directions.
7.07.2009
the silent scream
Hey lady, STOP STANDING IN THE DOORWAY GIVING THE STINKY, OBVIOUSLY CRAZY HOMELESS PERSON CONVERSATIONAL OPENINGS.
Some people are absolutely accomplices in their own mook-ing.
Some people are absolutely accomplices in their own mook-ing.
True Customer Tales- bags and bags
mother and daughter, daughter buying a tall stack of Louis L'Amour westerns.
me: would you like a bag?
daughter: Yeah.
mom: why don't you just put them in your bag?
daughter, exasperated: because I want another bag to put in my bag!
I should compile an oral history of the question would you like a bag?
me: would you like a bag?
daughter: Yeah.
mom: why don't you just put them in your bag?
daughter, exasperated: because I want another bag to put in my bag!
I should compile an oral history of the question would you like a bag?
7.06.2009
Robert McNamara 1916-2009
"The architect of the Vietnam war" is a tough headline to go out on.
Seeing things as we'd like them to be instead of how they really is a lovely pile of leaves heaped over a wire snare. It'd be easy enough for someone to craft a modern Grimm's Fairy Tale from McNamara's legacy.
Although maybe Errol Morris already did.
Seeing things as we'd like them to be instead of how they really is a lovely pile of leaves heaped over a wire snare. It'd be easy enough for someone to craft a modern Grimm's Fairy Tale from McNamara's legacy.
Although maybe Errol Morris already did.
True Customer Tales- a new low
There's a guy with a room temperature IQ and poor personal hygiene who mostly preys on the sale cart. Occasional detours to the new arrivals table yield just enough sales to qualify him as a 'customer', granting him greater forbearance than I accord the usual run of demi-homeless browser.
Today he tested that tolerance by proffering a quarter with a penny welded to its surface by some unidentifiable food-like substance to cover his twenty six cent sales tax.
I gave him an "are you serious" look before totaling out and flipping it into the trash.
Today he tested that tolerance by proffering a quarter with a penny welded to its surface by some unidentifiable food-like substance to cover his twenty six cent sales tax.
I gave him an "are you serious" look before totaling out and flipping it into the trash.
7.05.2009
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