True Customer Tales

Older, not obviously crazy lady brings a dollar book from the sale cart to the counter.

"What's this book about?"

I scan the cover and note the title- Organic Chemistry Molecular Modeling Workbook by Warren J. Hehre.

"It looks like an organic chemistry workbook."

"But what's it about? I'm not gonna buy it or anything, I'm just curious."

"I'd say it's a workbook for people taking an organic chemistry class. And it includes a CD."

"Oh. I'm not gonna buy it or anything."

"Mmmmmhmmm."

why do people wear ugg boots in public

I do not understand.

And the various knockoff companies encourage this grotesque behavior by making them in various pastel colors.

It's nauseating!

I can understand wearing a hideously uncomfortable shoe because it looks smashing, but I'll never get wearing something that makes you look like an escapee from a Prehistoric Man exhibit just because it's comfortable.

Unless of course you can rock them like Raquel.

attn BOBO

WHAT NOT TO DO THIS WEEK.

a challenger rises

Dramatic Prairie Dog, meet Dramatic Lemur

title of the week

The Wild Geese of Beaver Bog by Bernd Heinrich.

This title is wasted on a natural history book.

attn Hudson

Scanned photo albums of German soldiers from WWII

superbowl

How did this become a de facto national holiday?

We might as well close the store a half hour before kickoff time, because the entire downtown goes DEAD except for the bars.

It's like Christmas Day in February, only with steroids instead of gifts.

Your day is going better than you think

One of the nice young gals at the coffee shop was weeping this morning while slicing my bagel.

Seems that last night her boyfriend of several years confessed to cheating on her a few months ago.

With a Tijuana prostitute.

"I thought he was a nice guy!" she wailed.

Ouch!